My Biggest Challenge

My biggest challenge is I trust easily, give multiple chances and when the expected happens, I cry. I am a people pleaser and lots of times I even cancel my important stuff to do unimportant tasks for others. But today I am writing this post with a very heavy heart and I am literary crying inside. I recently realized that you need to be selfish too. I overdo things to make everyone comfortable but when I need or expect, I find my hands empty. I find that people who are supposed to be with me are not there but strangers are helping me. I was fooled by people, not once, twice but infinite times, and just because they are my blood, I let go of things. I don't hold grudges. I overcompensate for things they did for me and then they take me for granted. Now I am thinking of teaching them a lesson when I am emotional but as soon as I cool down I think of Letting go of things.

I so want to be blunt right now and tell you guys the sad story of my life. I even write it three times but ended up deleting it every time I hit the save button. Maybe I am so weak that I can't even come forward with the truth. I so want to scold those people who wronged me, but instead, I am writing a blog on a website that no one is going to read, at least for now. Be positive Dheera, People will read your blog one day and know who you are. Well, now you must be thinking she is crazy and talking to herself. I do that a lot of people. I ask myself questions and I answer myself. Sometimes, I even get into a debate where to and fro ask questions and then answer. Sometimes, It is such a heated conversation with myself that I had to drink two glasses of water.

My other challenge is I only plan and I never execute, just like many people in the world. I sleep for 9 hours daily, which I think is too much. Before sleeping, I plan my entire day including waking up early in the morning but I wake late and I sleep late. I book an exercise slot every day but hardly attend. I meal prep for the entire week, for example, I cut Veggies, make gravy, buy fruits, make dough but cook hardly twice and in the end, most of my preparation goes to the garbage bin.

I so want to achieve in my life but I guess the passion is not enough.